The #BROFAVOR

“Hey Bro, Will You Put Some Sunscreen on my Back!?”

Don’t be embarrassed future tan guy.  We’ve all been there.  You need some sunscreen on your back and you’re surrounded by only dudes.  Perhaps there’s a fine lady around, but it doesn’t seem appropriate to ask her either.  Don’t be scared.  Tanny has got your back…literally.  It’s time for the #BROFAVOR.

You see putting sunscreen on another man’s back isn’t shameful at all.  As a matter of fact, you should consider the #BROFAVOR the greatest honor one man can give to another man.  If your bro’s back is hairy or pimply, then it’s really just that much more impressive.

I know what you’re thinking.

“No way Tanny!  I don’t want to put sunscreen on my friends back!  It’s kind of weird and might make people question my sexuality!”

Nah dog, it ain’t like that.  Now let me tell you why.

Science, Sexuality, & The #BROFAVOR

Recent studies from The Tanny Mangino Institute have found that there is a high correlation between sexy ladies and the #brofavor.  In a double-blind experiment of multiple groups of males, it was found that the groups where man-on-man sunscreen back application occurred were 200% more likely to attract sexy women.  What’s even more interesting was that groups where the men seemed to enjoy applying sunscreen on their counterparts’ backs were 400% more likely to attract hotties.

With statistics like that, you would be crazy not to leverage the bro favor!.  That is, of course, assuming you like to hangout with sexy babes.  The study notes that women perceived the #brofavor to signal that the male is responsible, concerned about safety, has enough money to afford sunscreen, and is likely to develop a radiant, responsible tan.

The science don’t lie folks, and neither does old Tanny!

Thousands of Years, One #BROFAVOR

Whoa there Tanny!  How could the #brofavor have existed for millennia when sunscreen has only been around for about a hundred years.  Well my friends, like Gandalf says in Lord of The Rings opening prologue:

“Much that once was, is lost; for none now live who remember it” 

Get ready, because Tanny is about to drop some serious history on you.

What you’ve been told is false.  Sunscreen has actually existed for thousands of years.  Not necessarily in the same form we use today, but humankind has been pursuing responsible tanning since the dawn of our known history.  You think our noble cousins the neanderthals didn’t want a stunning, all-natural, responsible tan?  I mean, they still might have looked like apes a little bit, but those apes understood a good tan!

Sunscreen in previous generations took on many forms, and so did the #brofavor.  Pre-civilization, when humans were primarily hunters and gatherers, men would create a mud mixture from dirt and water that would cake onto skin and protect from sunburn.  You can see a great example of this in the first Predator movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger.  I’m sure if anyone was alive at the end of that movie besides Arnold, he would have loved to put some mud-screen on their back for them!

Generations passed, men learned to speak, farm, and build cities, however they still had trouble applying sunscreen to their own backs.  Time passes, but the #brofavor is immortal.  One of the greatest kings in all history, King Tannis the Dark, helped unify what is now considered Europe, under the banner of responsible tanning.  Before battle, King Tannis commanded his feared shirtless soldiers to rub a mud and grass mixture on each others backs to protect against a long day of fighting out in the sun.  The highest honor for a knight in Tannis’ army was the opportunity to apply this protective mixture to the King’s back.

Now that you know the science and history behind the #brofavor, what do you think?  Do you understand the hidden blessing that’s in front of you?

Now friend, won’t you put some sunscreen on old Tanny’s back for him?

Tan Responsibly,

Tanny Mangino